Monday, November 16, 2015

Essay 3 New Topic Sentence

Andrew Hamer
English 1100_35
November 16, 2015
Essay 3 Topic Sentence
        Because the police are viewed badly by society, it is causing a divide between the police and the people.
        The police are being viewed badly by society, therefore it is causing a divide between the 

 people and them.
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1 comment:

  1. Prof. YoungNovember 19, 2015 at 7:34 AM

    Andrew, thank you for posting your thesis.

    In what way can you revise both statements to more clearly articulate your position? A reader may say yes it is causing a divide but it has been a divide for years. In what way can you convince this person that something *should* be done?

    Adding a *should statement* will make your thesis stronger.

    I look forward to your revision.

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